She was my client for many years. Smart, funny, creative and ambitious, she was willing to try new things and I loved working with her, popping issues one by one like soap bubbles.
But there was one thing she always mulishly refused to explore because she was too afraid.
Last year that problem came back with a vengeance. And to top it up, now she was a mother. She was overwhelmed by the multitude of things to do and the pressure to do them all well. Sleep deprived and scared by the perspective that she isn’t a good enough parent, she would punish herself with self-hurting behaviour.
She couldn’t stand the idea that by not solving her issues her little girl will be affected.
So she had to bite the bullet.
It was an extraordinary journey, and we had to advance little by little. But each step conquered one more piece of that uncharted territory.
It wasn’t all rainbow and unicorns. There were also ghastly moments of tremendous pain gushing out from her childhood; she could have lost her resolve. But she held steady.
A lot of people shy away from facing their fear because first, to be honest, it’s not exactly attractive. People might like watching horror movies, but living them is a different ballgame.
Then they think it takes a lot of courage to do it – and they don’t see themselves as the heroic type.
The truth is, you don’t need courage to do it.
- Curiosity can do the trick when the need to know “what happens if…?” is stronger than your fear.
- Then there is plain old stubbornness – you’re scared, but you’re more determined not to let anything go against your will.
- Also, when there is something more important for you – like protecting your child -, fear seems like a small price to pay.
The craziest part?
What we think we can or cannot do has nothing to do with what we ACTUALLY CAN do.
Facing your fears is not appealing. It’s not sexy.
But it’s liberating.
With each layer of fear you peel off, you reveal a new level of strength. A new world of possibilities, creativity and freedom.
Do you think it’s worth a try?
Want to know 4 ways to deal with your fear?
Read it as part of the weekly challenge I run in my Facebook group. This and other cool stuff to help you bring to light, shake the dust off your current ideas and lure you into experimenting with something new, that’ll give you more freedom.